...and people will say, with justification, 'here he goes AGAIN!'. yes...
guitar playing, unless you are focused on playing as a pro, or trying to get to be a pro, is 'not about guitar' to me. in our minds, i think everyone has some sort of vague goal. some of us have very specific, non-vague goals. i am one of those with vague goals....but, with guitar and a few other things, i am very specific. i want my equipment to not let me down; i want to not have distractions when i get 'in the mindset of just playing'.
i do NOT want to be a pro. i don't even want to be an amateur. i want to enjoy myself, first, foremost, and maybe totally. i like that i can share what i do with others...but if i could not, i would still play for me.
that thing with recording, MLJ-i am usually aware that it is turned on in the middle of doing something. 20 years ago, it would have really bugged me. sometimes, now, it eats at me some. but...in some book when i was trying to learn about the new electronics and recording, the guy says something like 'it's your time, it's your studio, you can do as many takes as you want, or not'. this is completely true. i aint payin' some guy to record. i can delete whatever i don't like. i can ignore what i don't like. it's all up to me, and this removes 'the pressure'. i aint trying to impress anyone...i doubt i'm going to...but it doesn't matter. i am doing the whole thing for me. i have to satisfy myself, and my inner critic frequently gets a ball bat up side the head.
i spent saturday and sunday running a rented trencher burying water lines before it gets cold. it beat the hoohoo out of me. my hands are sore all over....hit a rock, the thing bucks like a rodeo pony. i got lots of rock. i had to get the texas toothpick out a couple times (a 30# iron bar that you use to whack away at rocks/what have you). sunday late i was tired, and trying to relax, and i got Robert's backing cd out...(thank you again, Robert). i was just doing whatever i wanted along with the tracks...and i got very strange a couple times. off key, trying to see if it 'fit' with the track. my dad used to tell me 'every wrinkle you get in your brain is learning. try to get as many wrinkles as you can.'. a couple goes by this track, and i got like 'i'm going to record this'. i have a friend who really enjoys some of my silliness...in fact, i have a couple friends who say they enjoy what i do. this is icing on my cake...but my work on this track started out 'bad'. it doesn't please me for the first minute or so...but the ideas please me. my hands will not always do what i want them to do...they tell me i have arthritis in most of my joints....i would agree it's 'something'...whatever. so...airing my laundry to you guys...here's the track:
http://www.box.net/shared/sohb838c12asv68ll80lmy point is...if it doesn't bother me to share this kind of stuff (and i know it aint pristine-VB has already done pristine, and i think it scared him-it woulda scared me had i done that track, too), then...no one else pays your bills. if you ever get your head wrapped around that idea...it will free you.